Adamantine Myers
Introduction
‘There
isn’t any single rational reason, beyond the vagueness of reality, to wake up
in the morning, and having the drive to be all so well, most of all, going to
school, and pretending to be alive. Confusing, but true.”
-
Excerpt
from the Emo Book.
“Have
you ever tried dipping your fingertips in ice cold water? That paralyzing
sensation that runs from your fingers, to your shoulders, then suddenly your
whole body starts shivering?”
“I
have…”
“Only
at this very moment, my whole body’s plunged in freezing water. I could hardly
feel my hands nor flutter my feet to rise up. But then I thought this might be
a good thing,
Because
I was deeply aching inside,
But
still I was in fact, frozen numb, my heart, nearly…adamantine.”
Call
me Adamantine Myers, not my real name, status - single, alone and unhappy. Just
imagine how you look like on a usual lazy Sunday; you woke up late, grabbed a
cup of coffee, you walked straight to the couch and watched an epic episode of
adventure time on cartoon network and paid no attention on any decent practice
of personal hygiene, well I mostly look like that, only, I look like that every
day, not just on Sundays.
I
have a proper excuse for looking fidgety, I’m in college.
Now
you might think I’m the most miserable guy on earth based on my description…I
just simply thought of the things that could best describe me, so I came up
with such fed-up words. Despite me being explicitly wretched, I try not to suck
out the fun from everyone. I also see myself quite wild, and I believe I have
quite a gratifying humour. Yeah, I know what you think, I’m just one of the
“Unpredictable types”.
“Having
fun is far different from being happy.”
Honestly
speaking…I might sound overtly shallow, but I haven’t been truly happy for
three years now, I counted. Ever since I broke up with my first ever “special
someone” three years ago, I’ve never experienced another daydreaming because of
late night hi’s and early hello’s.
For
other people, happiness is being with their families, being rich and wealthy,
being successful, or just being fully contented with what they have. You might
think I’m too shallow, but happiness for me is being with people or with that
“special someone” who loves and cares for me as I do to them.
Whatever
right? No one cares. If you’ve been wondering how my life became this fed-up,
well it all started at the most awkward years for most of us, HIGH SCHOOL…
I’ve
rehearsed a thousand times
To amend
this broken heart of mine,
I kept
thinking what’s on your mind,
I just
can’t hear the words you say behind.
This
sacrifice I give to you,
Will
light the path in your journey out of the blue,
Whatever
happens I’d still love you.
Though I
know I’ll get nothing from you,
I’m still
hoping for a love that’s true.
-Excerpts
from the Emo book
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